Webstomp! July 28

Webstomp! is an occasional delve into the bullshit I find on the internet.  Blame Al Gore, he invented the internet, you know.


1. A person thinks it is a good idea to get out of his car and punch a bicyclist while people are filming him. 

I fucking hate cyclists too, dude.

2. You should always be very descriptive when creating a Lost Dog poster.  Seriously.

3. Here is an ad for an apartment in a converted church.  Check out the fifth picture and tell me if something in the background feels a bit....wrong.

4.   I like some 3DS animations.  Some of them are pretty impressive.  This one  is a pretty neat animation however, the idea here is fucking stupid.  I welcome your comments.

If you have suggestions for future Webstomp! articles, please feel free to keep them to yourself.

My Nemesis... And Your's Too, Most Likely

I made a startling discovery today.  I discovered that there is a person in this world that I can hate more than I ever thought was possible.  And seriously, I hate a few people in this world, as many of you well know. 

Today I discovered the existence of a man named John Heald.  John Heald is the Senior Cruise Director for Carnival Cruise Lines.  I hate him.  His job, from what I can gather, is to float around to tropical venues getting sauced and writing his stupid blog about it.  And he gets paid for it.  Probably a lot, too. 

In my experience, if your job title has the word “Senior” in it, you make a lot of money.  Especially if you are the only person at your company with that title.  See, it doesn’t work for me (my title being Senior Technician) because I am neither senior nor am I the only one.

I am a little disappointed that I cannot get a new t-shirt made prior to the cruise: 

I hate him purely out of jealousy.

These Are Not The Droids You Are Looking For

Amazon, being the devils that they are, sent me another recommendation.

will... I will resist!!!

This is not the purchase I am looking for....

Arrghh, I've bought the damn films on VHS, on VHS again when they were digitally remastered, on DVD in (Lord forgive me) digitally enhanced versions....

Must not buy the same films again, must not......

George Lucas does not need my money.....

I should take the money and donate it to a worthy cause, not spend it on shiny, shiny, HD goodness.....

That's it!

I'm now humming the cantina song in my head…

I can't hear you.....

help me

I Think It Could Work

Cover Me In Chocolate and Throw Me To The Lesbians

I have tried to tell my mother that dressing up her dog is, frankly, a little weird.  Despite my protests, she still occasionally puts some kind of scarf or whatnot on him.  Other dog owners put their poor companions into cute little raincoats or sweaters or whatever.  But seriously, what's wrong with a good old fashioned funny graphic t-shirt?

If, like me, you enjoy browsing custom t-shirt places online, then you have probably seen the ones with dogs whereing shirts that say things like "bitches love me" or "throw me a bone."

Drink Me Some Kool-Aid and Sleep like a Baby!

1. I assume this was the only option available for interview because everyone else was at work.

2. Who doesn't love a glass of grape Koolaid?

Webstomp! July 15

Webstomp! is an occasional delve into the bullshit I find on the internet.  Blame Al Gore, he invented the internet, you know.

1. Stupid Person

 2.  Trailer for a new Star Wars game.  The Trailer for the forthcoming Star Wars: The Old Republic game is pretty amazing.  In fact, it is my opinion that it looks better than any of the three prequel films.  Lets face it, those were shit.

3. An owl smacks a window.  

4. Casey Anthony's To Do List
     Kill kid   (check)
     Get away with it  (check)
     Get paid to have sex in front of a camera (what?)

Good Morning

First I would like to say, I am thrilled that a new blog was created and that I was once again invited to share my emotions publicly.

Second I would like to say, the alternator went out in our car this morning so I am in a fanfuckingtabulous mood.

Neither of these are the reason for my post though. I have had a "gripe" for sometime now and I feel the need to share.

I love having social networks for me to keep up with all my friends. I am nosey. Anyone who knows me will tell you this is a fact. Social networks give me the opportunity to be nosey without having to speak to people who annoy me. What I don't "get" is why on any given day I can wake up and the first five posts of the days are couples announcing their love for their spouse. Guess what, if you married that person I already assume your undying love for them is securely in place. I don't need to read it five times a week. I have never woke up and thought, I wonder if my husband loves me because he never announces it on (facebook, myspace, google plus). Nor have I ever thought, I bet my husband wonders if I care about him, I better go purchase a billboard and tell everyone in the world so he understands my love. Guess what, I don't give a shit who knows if I do or don't love my husband so I am not going to post if for the world to see. If I see you posting your love or how wonderful your spouse is, I assume, you are doing it to make yourself feel better for the shitty relationship you are in and you want people to assume its good. This is also true for, awesome kids posts. Your kids are not awesome. They are brats and I don't give a shit. Here is a thought, lets just say for shits sake, everyone from this day forward can assume that if you are in a relationship, you are in love, and your spouse is awesome. Problem solved, quit posting it. If you find this is no longer the case, there is a solution, divorce. Its like the abortion for marriage.

Disclaimer (So I can refer some idiot back here one day)

Because I know that I will need this at some point:

1. This is my place to put my opinions.
2. Occasionally, I am utterly and totally full of shit.
3. Okay, you got me. Probably more than just "occasionally."
4. I like italics.
5. There will be times when I use this blog in order to bitch about things that I know little or nothing about.
6. Which is perfectly okay, since the First Amendment says I can.
7. I promise I will attempt to be polite when I tell you what I think of your idiotic opinions.
8. But there is no guarantee.
9. Anyone who decides to correct my spelling or grammar in a way that I feel is "douchey," will be forever banned from my blog.
10. This is done for my amusement (and only a select few others) and exists entirely at my whim.